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Unification

The past year has been an experiment in “what would I do if I could do anything.” Obviously, reenacting Space Camp was beyond the established scope, but I have spent time reading and writing and blogging and drawing and here I am. Well, here we are… With multiple websites, a bazillion domain names, and too many parts being parceled out.

So, starting today: one me, one siteMy reviews, my rants, my photos, my life dramas, all in one place. If you don’t care about my FlickR feed, you can ignore it. If you don’t want to read my public diary, skip it. If you are desperate for a cute “thank you” card, then, please please please visit my etsy store. :) Regardless, I’m unified. All my parts, my remedial polymath self, are together here on the internet for your enjoyment, enlightenment, and voyeurism.

Just like in real life. Except the voyeurism. Cause then I’d have to press charges.

Analyze This: Underworld as Miscegenation Allegory

A few nights ago The Boy and I were bored and wanting to watch something stupid in bed that it would be okay if we fell asleep during. So, we pulled out our copy of Underworld, the Crow/Matrix-copying vampire versus werewolf flick that is much more badass that Bella mooning over Edward. I mean, not that it’s a good movie. Kate Beckinsale looks hot and badass in that suit that prolly gave her a yeast infection for a year and it has Michael Sheen in it! Plus, Bill Nighy? Always a win. Sure Ben from Felicity is cast as doctor (once again) and I’m like, dude can barely speak full sentences, no way he’d do well in a medical school interview, but overall, nice cast.

Anyhow, the quality (of lack therefore of) is not the point of this at all. It’s that when watching it, it occurred to me that it’s an allegory for miscesgentation, particularly that between a lording class (Vampires or, say Southern plantation owners) and enslaved peoples (Werewolves or, you know, enslaved African-Americans). The war that continues to wreak havoc between the two immortal species, who share a common evolutionary ancestor, is because a werewolf loved and mated with a vampire. The vampire’s father thinks this is an abomination, a dirtying of their bloodline, a threat to their very species, so he kills his daughter. Obviously her lover is angered and rises up against his servitude and then shit hits the fan. Next thing you know, you have lots of leather capes and people with guns and their best “stern serious face” and slow-motion fighting scenes. What a world, what a world!!!!!

The film comes firmly down on the “race-mixing is okay!” and “but what about love?” side of things. I mean, there’s not only a new Vampire/Werewolf love, but a mixed baby of sorts. WHO HAPPENS TO BE BETTER AND STRONGER AND AWESOMER THAN THE TWO SPECIES!! Could this movie be anymore clear? I mean, yeah, it probably could since it’s kinda confusing and not that well written… I’m not sure whether the writers of this series intended to make this kinda of “we should all get along”/”world peace” statement via Vampires and Lycans, but there ya go.

Intentional or not, it’s better than me realizing the film is on the side of justifying genocide and master races… Cause then I would be forced to know that Michael Sheen was in a movie that was uncool and I’d have to stop crushing on him. Oh, wait…

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The Big Picture: Girl with the Dragon Tattoo

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(Spoilers!)

Last night, The Boy and I finally got around to watching David Fincher’s The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. I had waited to see it because I kept wanting to read the book. I have this thing about reading books before seeing movie adaptations… However, I’ve tried three times to get through Stieg Larsson’s runaway hit and I just can’t. I don’t know if it’s the translation making some of the phrasing a bit odd for me or the fact that Mikael just isn’t that interesting a character and he’s in the first part of the book.

After seeing the movie, I definitely think the latter is true. If it weren’t for the natural charisma of Daniel Craig, I would really give a flying fuck about Mikael and his journalistic issues. There’s a reason that Lisbeth Salander is the titular girl with the dragon tattoo. She is an amazing character, played brilliantly by the Oscar-nominated newcomer Rooney Mara. Lisbeth has had a hard life, filled with violence and mental illness and, some have argued, autism. She has been touted as a feminist hero, though that can also be argued, especially since she takes revenge upon her rapist by raping him. I have to say, those scenes were really hard to watch. Raping your rapist makes you a rapist. That’s not okay, in any moral world. It just keeps the rape happening. Though, the outward marking of him as a perpetrator of violence against women was an interesting revenge fantasy played out, since so many rapists walk free and you can’t tell by “looking” at someone. Also, the massive amount of violence against women, detailed and shown in photographs and flashbacks, seemed to want to be a part of some anti-misogynist statement, yet is very much based on a misogynist form of storytelling.
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Feminisms: Mommy Wars

Speaking of “mommy porn,” I thought I’d vent a bit about the so-called “mommy wars” that the wife of presumptive GOP nominee Mitt Romney has become embroiled in. Ann Romney, a “stay-at-home” mother, came under fire for never having “worked a day in her life.” Obviously the political right took this badly worded statement out of context and spun it all the way to the other side of their war on my uterus. Of course what Ms. Rosen meant was that Mrs. Romney has not had to work for money to take care of the children she raised, not that raising children is easy peezy. In fact, she was wealthy enough to pay help to help her raise them. I’m not saying that her efforts as a stay-at-home mom should be derided. All women, of all lives, deserve respect and value. But “mommys” aren’t more important than other women. Their experiences are different but not “harder.” Well, except poor mothers, who Mitt Romney thinks should have to get a job to earn welfare to pay for their kids.

HOW DO THEY NOT SEE THEIR RIDICULOUSNESS?!?!?! Ann Romney can throw a fit for being called out on her privilege and claim that Democrats hate mothers while she and her husband make it harder for poor mothers to raise their kids. Only rich women can be stay-at-home moms, I guess. Even though beloved anti-feminist Phyllis Schlafley is still going on about how women shouldn’t work. People, if you really want this to happen, YOU HAVE TO PAY FOR IT SOMEHOW.

Babies be costing mad money, yo.

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